Monday, February 18th
We don’t know if she took the time to attend the biggest gathering of Smurfs ever to be recorded, in Lauchringen (Germany), but after her withdrawal from the Doha Open last week, Caroline Wozniacki announced that she was also withdrawing from the Dubaï Open. In the Emirates, Julia Georges was knocked out by Alison Riske in the first round (4-6, 5-7), just like Elise Mertens, who was defeated by Lin Zhu (7-5, 4-6, 6-7). Could this be a good week for the outsiders?
Tuesday, February 19th
Three millions euros. That is the sum which Choupette, Karl Lagerfeld’s cat, will inherit. What a funny world… A world in which Kristina Mladenovic managed to defeat Naomi Osaka (6-3, 6-3). A world in which six of the top seeds were knocked out from the Rio de Janeiro Open on the same day (Dominic Thiem, Fabio Fognini, Marco Cecchinato, Dušan Lajović, Malek Jaziri and Nicolas Jarry). A strange world, really.
Wednesday, February 20th
And three more surprises on this Wednesday, three! First, Angelique Kerber lost against Hsieh Su-wei (7-5, 4-6, 0-6) in the fourth round in Dubaï. Then, Roger Federer announced that he will take part in the Madrid Masters 1000 in May. And finally, the craziest surprise came from the United States, where an 18 year-old girl who didn’t know she was pregnant fell into a coma… and woke up after giving birth to a baby. Congratulations.
Thursday, February 21st
The disgusting dog owners who live in Andorra are now warned : it is now mandatory to get your dog’s DNA registered, to find and punish the owners who don’t pick up the feces. An information which didn’t stop the global fiasco of the favorites this week on planet tennis. In Marseille, Ugo Humbert crushed Borna Coric (6-3, 6-3) while Simona Halep lost against Belinda Bencic (6-4, 4-6, 2-6) in Dubaï. And it’s not over yet…
Friday, February 22nd
… Far from over. Here’s the proof: after Halep, Bencic managed to defeat Elina Svitolina (6-2, 3-6, 7-6) and qualify for the final. Only one feat today? Phew, we can finally relax… But don’t forget to try Tudder, the new Tinder-like application designed to match… cows.
Saturday, February 23rd
XXL performance from Bencic, third and final episode: in the final, the world number 45 didn’t crumble and lifted the trophy after defeating Petra Kvitova (6-3, 1-6, 6-2). For his return on the courts, Juan Martin del Potro was also hoping to lift another trophy, but due to this week’s overall weirdness, he ended up being defeated by Mackenzie McDonald (6-4, 3-6, 7-6) in the quarter-finals in Delray Beach. Just like John Isner, who lost against Daniel Evans (6-3, 2-6, 3-6). In the end, the final in Florida will see the world number 82 Radu Albot, who defeated McDonald (3-6, 6-0, 6-0) and who is the first Moldavian to reach this stage of an ATP tournament, face the world number 148 who defeated Isner. At this rate, the behavior of this Chinese woman who pretended to be pregnant to travel with her two cats after hiding them under her jumper at the airport in Taiwan can almost be considered to be normal.
Sunday, February 24th
Things are finally back to normal! 30% of Americans would be willing to give up on sex for a year to keep their Netflix accounts, according to a recent study. Alison Van Uytvanck triumphed in Budapest after defeating Markéta Vondroušová (1-6, 7-5, 6-2). Pretty normal, as she was the title-holder. In Marseille, Stéfanos Tsitsipás defeated Mikhail Kukushkin (7-5, 7-6). Pretty logical, as the recent semi-finalist at the Australian Open was the top-seed of the tournament. Laslo Djere won in Rio after defeating Félix Auger-Aliassime (6-3, 7-5). Normal, as the latter had gone through the qualifying rounds. It feels good to see things being back to normal again!
By Florian Cadu