Even if it's known to be a Gentleman sport, tennis also has its share of bad losers. Not very fair play guys showing a vivid imagination to explain a defeat, an withdrawal or even a treadmill fall. In short, people like you and us.
1/ Choose your panties wisely
Lighton Ndefwayl. Remember this name as it might be the last time you’ll ever hear it. This modest Zambian tennis player responded to his defeat against compatriot Musumba Bwayla with the worst justification ever heard in the world of tennis: «
Bwayla is a stupid man and a hopeless player. He has a huge nose and is cross-eyed. Girls hate him. He beat me because my jockstrap was too tight and because when he serves he farts, and that made me lose my concentration, for which I am famous throughout Zambia.» Legendary.
2/ Monfils, stop to perspiration !
Play for time. Between two exchanges or during a change of side, all the players do it. More or less maliciously. On the 2nd of January this year, in the second round of the Doha tournament against Philipp Kohlschreiber, the French player Gael Monfils received a warning for having spent too much time with his head in the towel between two points. To explain his action, he found this tasty excuse for the chair umpire: "
I'm black, so I sweat a lot! And so Obviously I need time to recover!"
3/ The kangoroo’s claw
January 2011, Melbourne. To explain a leg injury - that didn't prevent her to qualify for the quarter-finals at the expense of Anastasija Sevastova - Caroline Wozniacki told the press that she had been attacked by a baby kangaroo during a walk in the park : «
I saw a kangaroo lying in distress on the gress. looked so cute, but once it started scratching me I was a coward and I ran away.» A few hours later, she called for a press conference to amend her version : «
''I made it up because it sounded better than what actually happened…I walked into a treadmill. You know, that's my blonde side. Sometimes that happens.»
4/ Tarpischev’s crocodile tears
The charm of all the cups lies into the surprises and the emotions it
generates.
About this, The Davis Cup by BNP Paribas isn't far from the best. July 2009, at the Sports Palace in Tel Aviv, Israel crushed Russia in the quarterfinals (3-0). Something that was not at all to the taste of Shamil Tarpischev, the Russian captain. For him, it's not summer that's deadly, but rather the timing: "
Look at the United States, Spain, Argentina or Germany. The best players were missing. Such a schedule gives smaller nations an unfair advantage. That's why there are so many surprises."
5/ To scream more to earn more
It is widely known, to be efficient on a court, you have to be relaxed. And for Michelle Larcher de Brito, the body language mostly go through... the vocal cords. This is at least what she suggested when she was told in June 2009 that her "
singing" was exasperating her opponents: "
I'm not going to remain silent and then think: 'Oh, you lost because you you've restrained yourself to shout'. No. shouting is part of my game and that's why I'm successful". Now we've heard it all...
6/ Dementieva’s sun therapy
Never underestimate the benefits of the sun. Especially the Middle East's one. October 2010. Engaged as seed No. 1 at the Luxembourg Open, Elena Dementieva withdrawed on the eve of the opening match. The reason? Tendinitis in her right foot. Which at that time of the year is almost synonymous with end of season. But then, four days later, the Russian was running like a rabbit... at the Doha Masters.
7/ Justine Henin : Hands up !
In the dressing rooms, Justine Henin was never really popular. And this incident at Roland Garros in 2003 probably didn't help. Against Serena Williams in the semifinals, the Belgian player was led 4-2 in the last round. While the American was getting ready to serve, the Belgian raised her hand to say that she wasn't ready. The first ball ended up in the net and Serena was convinced that she had two balls lefts. Except that the chair umpire didn't see Henin's gesture who made sure not to confess. The American was mad and let the game slip through her fingers (6-2, 4-6, 7-5). In February 2011, Justine Henin made this pseudo-confession: "
I should have said that I had raised my hand even if I remain convinced that it wouldn't have changed the course of things. I hope not to be in bad faith by saying this".
8/ Benoît Paire and twitter
Benoît Paire is rather thoroughgoing. After his defeat against Philipp Kohlschreiber in the second round of the Open de Moselle in September 2012, the French man refused to shake hands with the chair umpire Magdi Somat, with whom he already had a precedent in Los Angeles. Then, on Twitter, he posted this message: "
Not sure what to write without being too nasty to people who don't understand tennis! good evening". All returned to normal the next day with another message: "
I know that my behaviour was inappropriate and I apologize. It proved me that I still have a lot of progress to make on my attitude" Strangely, the first message seemed more honest.
9/ The Roger Federer’s victims association
From 2004 to 2009, almost all victims of Roger Federer's used the same excuse: "
I couldn't do anything, it was just too strong". While the hegemony of the Swiss player started to decline, the argument became less frequent. To the point we almost started to miss it. Thus, Riccardo Piatti, former coach of Richard Gasquet, Ivan Ljubicic and Novak Djokovic, called on all those who considered the player close to retirement to apologize: "
I would like all those who said that 'Roger was finished 'to apologize. But I know they won't."
By Charles Michel
