You know that the US Open is starting when…

Since it moved from Forest-Hills to Flushing Meadows, the US Open doesn’t look like any other Grand Slam. Excess took up residence there. Overview...

 ... The holidays are over; it's time to scratch the tennis itch. ... You hear the players' soles whining during games. ... You remember Sampras throwing up on the court in the quarterfinals against Corretja in ‘96. Not surprising, as the day before the guy hit the ball with Agassi in the streets of New York for a commercial. ... Moreover, it was not for a sponsor or other commercial endorsement, but to show that it is actually possible to play on cement! Those Yanks would do anything to show that their surface is the best. ... When night sessions stretch until late hours, well after Cinderella is home from the ball... ... You start dunking with both of your feet like Sampras. Except that your "air balls" all end up in the tarps. ... The Americans want to win so badly that they are willing to collect points and penalty games. ... Central Park's courts are even busier than usual. ... The Arthur Ashe Stadium becomes hell on earth: 40 °C, 55% humidity. ... For you, Mardy Fish is not “the day of the fish”. ... Men and women of the Top 10 who haven’t done anything in the first three Grand Slams start stressing out when arriving in the Big Apple. Like mere students a few hours from their finals. ... Djoko imitates McEnroe. ... The USTA always find something to celebrate. You choose: the anniversary of Pancho Gonzales's victory, Arthur Ashe's or Sampras' retirement... ... Djokovic licks his lips because the time has finally come for him to get back on his favourite surface. ... The American Federation’s steward could face dismissal if popcorn or hot dogs happen to run out. ...The next generation of phenoms from the Bollettieri academy starts to hatch. ...The winner goes home with the trophy that he's presented with on-court and not a replica model size, like in the other majors. And that's final. ... At each change of side, you expect to see cheerleaders. ... With a Central Court of twenty-two thousand seats, you want a show worthy of the Super Bowl! ... Novak Djokovic finished sawing his racquets and Jo-Wilfried Tsonga finished healing after his encounter with a Canadian fire hydrant... ... The fifth set ends in tie-break. ... For the last two years, you’ve known that the true final is Djoko/Roger. And that it’s on the Friday. ... Anyway, it's raining on Sunday, and on Monday, you can't hear the sound of the balls because of the planes. ... By the way, the planes fly so low that it looks like Roddick could touch them when he lobs his opponents!   By Jérémy Francisco and Rico Rizzitelli