Benoît Paire’s quick interview

With his mischievous eye and smirk, the Frenchman Benoit Paire has happily played along with us for a quick interview. Almost a composition exercise for this down-to-earth character…

  From what kind of fish is breaded fish made? Cod! I’m a big fan of cod!   Would you like to have a ponytail? Oh no, not at all… Short hair, always…   What’s the best music to make love? Someone like you by Adele. But I’ve never tried it.   What do you first look at a girl who’s beautiful inside? Her bum.   And vice-versa, the part of your body they like the most? I don’t think that they like many things about me, actually.   If your wife was a cake, what part would you take? The cherry on top.   How do you recognize fake tits from real ones? A little scar a little under them but, well, you have to be a bit of an expert. I’m not a fan of big tits; I’m more into small ones, preferably natural.   Do you prefer going out with a bearded woman or a humpback woman? A humpback woman.   Have you hesitated? Yeah and I’m still thinking about it. A bearded woman or a humpback woman? Well, a humpback woman can just be a turn of phrase, but a beard? Horrible.   Why do shops’ dummies always have pointy nipples? To look nice under a tee-shirt.   If you could spend one day with Pamela Anderson, what would you do? I would take advantage of it to get into her tits. To know them.   What do you do if your wife disobeys you? I hit her. No, I’m just kidding of course. We would have sex right away.   How to become rich? Play tennis!   What’s the purpose of Benedict XVI’s penis? To…   To pee? Yeah, exactly, to pee. I would never have thought of that.   Would you have sex with a member of your family to save him? Never!   Until what age will I live? Not too old I think.   Interview by Victor le Grand